RunningAHEAD - Topic: What's the (or one of) the funniest things that's happened to you when running/ racing?

Sockoni

posted: 1/22/2007 at 8:24 AM

I don't know what inspired this as I don't have enough experience under my belt to have a contribution, but I can tell a short cute story about walking! I live in Michigan, and every Labor Day, the bridge going from the lower to the upper pennisula is opened up for walkers. It's a 5 mile walk, and the governor leads the way, starting early in the morning. You don't have to be there right at the start, as buses are constantly transporting people from the south side of the bridge to the north side. The walk only goes one way (north to south), so you must be shuttled to the beginning. The first time hubby and I did it, we knew that you could arrive a little later than the crack of dawn starting time, but that was all we knew. We weren't familiar with the shuttling or going north to south business. So we get there an hour or so after it had started. Traffic was thick and the crowds were thicker! It was very busy and we were all psyched to go! So, Wayne and Garth (hubby and I) make their way toward the south part of the bridge to begin their 5 mile journey across, totally oblivious to the huge line of big yellow buses nearby loading tons of people. We were pumped, we were ready, tons of people, we made it there (it had been a couple hours drive), and it was sunny! We held our heads high, took in the sun, and began to march our way north....and as we made our first few steps onto the bridge noticed not one person walking the direction we were, but thousands walking toward us. You'd think we'd get it by then. But we just thought we must have been really late, so we continued on until someone yelled out, "You're going the wrong way!!!" Blush

What are you going to do? We just whipped around and made our way to a bus!!! Ok- that was silly! Your turn!! Big grin

tbarton

posted: 1/22/2007 at 9:11 AM

The other day I was finishing up a 9-mile run and enjoying the unseasonably warm weather. Just kind of coasting along. As I was running I startled a kitten that had been hiding in the grass watching me. It ran across the road and into the stubble of the corn field. I was a little worried about him. Didn't want him to get hit by a car or anything so I stopped to see where he'd gotten to ... and stirred up a pack (herd?) of 5 cute little pot bellied pigs that had been munching in the field. They were so small, I didn't even see them. They scared me. I scared them. They took off squealing and running back to the door of a nearby house, totally freaking me out. I mean, pot-bellied pigs? Who would expect that? LOL! I didn't know *what* was coming toward me. Blush

After I recovered from my heart attck, I just laughed at myself and ran on toward home. Smile

I'm sure that if any of the neighbors had been watching that it was probably a pretty amusing sight. Teresa

I'm Running to Eat

JakeKnight

posted: 1/22/2007 at 9:55 AM

A couple funnies, both scatological. If potty humor offends, you better skip the following: First story: Running the 1997 Chicago marathon, my first. I had not been warned that marathoners have a tendency to just go to the bathroom whereever they feel the urge. So I was shocked and highly amused at mile 5 to see three women walk about 30 feet off the road and all simultaneously drop their shorts and squat to take care of business. I'm not sure what was funnier: the fact that I was being mooned by three women, the fact that they couldn't bother to find a port-a-potty (or a bush or a car to hide behind), the fact that they all did it together (what? is that a group activity now?) ... or just the fact that this was only 5 miles into the race. Who the heck can't hold it for 5 miles? I've seen it enough now so it's not quite as funny ... but that first time had me giggling for miles. Second story: my long-lost running partner neighbor (he gave up years ago) used to do 3 miles with me just about every morning. He isn't exactly (how should I put this?) in great shape, so "running" isn't quite the right term. But since the boy had the worst diet in history and a bunch of other bad habits, he puked on just about every run. And I don't mean a little bit, either. I think I lost five pounds just because he ruined my appetite every morning. Well, the guy is (or was) a major pothead. Smoked like a fiend. Which, along with a diet consisting mainly of red meat and alcohol, tends to mess with your insides. So on one particular early Tennessee morning, we're running up a hill and (now how to put this politely?) .... well, he managed to simultaneously puke his guts out and crap his pants. It was classic. I think I cracked a rib trying not to laugh. Just say no to drugs, kids. This is what happens.

E-mail: eric.fuller.mail@gmail.com
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KennyRun

posted: 1/22/2007 at 11:14 AM
modified: 1/22/2007 at 11:15 AM

As I was finishing my first marathon (Chicago 2001), my running partner told me "you have to jump to hit the banner" as you cross the finish. Of course, I chose not to do such a stupid thing but, apparently, I did keep it stored in memory. At the end of my second marathon (Ontario Shore 2003), I was thrilled when, as I approached the finish, I realized I would break my 4 hr goal. That's when I saw it: the low hanging banner (about 7 1/2 feet up). Feeling the urge to prove something (not sure what), I leaped in the air and smacked the banner as I crossed the finish. In an instant, I knew I was in deep trouble. As my right foot landed, my knee gave way like it was made of mashed potatoes and I crumpled to the pavement. Getting up quickly before the swarm of nervous finish line helpers could do anything, I told them "No, no, I'm good. Really, no, I'm good. I planned that" and some other babbling. I did manage to scrape my elbow quite well and after getting my act together, wandered over to the medical tent. When the nurse asked, what happened, I told her "I got hit by a car at mile 13 but still managed to finish." After all, I'd be a fool to ever tell anyone how stupid I was trying to jump after 26.2 Smile

Unfortunately, the finish line photo did not capture either the jump or the fall, but I'm sure I provided a good laugh for those who saw it.

Sockoni

posted: 1/22/2007 at 2:13 PM

Quote from tbarton on 1/22/2007 at 9:11 AM:

stirred up a pack (herd?) of 5 cute little pot bellied pigs that had been munching in the field. They were so small, I didn't even see them. They scared me. I scared them. They took off squealing and running back to the door of a nearby house, totally freaking me out. I mean, pot-bellied pigs? Who would expect that? LOL! I didn't know *what* was coming toward me. After I recovered from my heart attck, I just laughed at myself and ran on toward home. I'm sure that if any of the neighbors had been watching that it was probably a pretty amusing sight. Teresa

Ok! This is off my original topic, but what the heck. This just reminded me of the time when I was taking a lunch break at work. I was lucky to work at a park, and was able to enjoy sunshine, picnic tables and acres of land right out the office door. I picked a grassy spot, laid down and quickly drifted off. Until. Next thing I know, I'm sorta waking up because I hear and FEEL something sniffing my face. I sleepily open my eyes, and I am nose-to-nose with a groundhog!! I coulda kissed it. I screamed, it squealed (and you HAD to hear it...I think the groundhog was more scared than me!!), it took off as fast as its big fuzzy butt would allow it to wobble and then stopped about 30 feet away. It turned around, looked at me, I looked at it and then just busted out laughing (after recovering from MY heart attack!) Big grin

zoom-zoom

rectumdamnnearkilledem

posted: 1/22/2007 at 2:21 PM

Man, I hope Claire will post her recent TMI running experience... Wink

k

Getting the wind knocked out of you is the only way to

remind your lungs how much they like the taste of air.

~ Sarah Kay

Sockoni

posted: 1/22/2007 at 3:37 PM

Quote from zoom-zoom on 1/22/2007 at 2:21 PM:

Man, I hope Claire will post her recent TMI running experience... k

*snort*

Sockoni

posted: 1/22/2007 at 3:48 PM

Quote from JakeKnight on 1/22/2007 at 9:55 AM:

First story: Running the 1997 Chicago marathon, my first. I had not been warned that marathoners have a tendency to just go to the bathroom whereever they feel the urge. So I was shocked and highly amused at mile 5 to see three women walk about 30 feet off the road and all simultaneously drop their shorts and squat to take care of business. I'm not sure what was funnier: the fact that I was being mooned by three women, the fact that they couldn't bother to find a port-a-potty (or a bush or a car to hide behind), the fact that they all did it together (what? is that a group activity now?) ... or just the fact that this was only 5 miles into the race. Who the heck can't hold it for 5 miles? I've seen it enough now so it's not quite as funny ... but that first time had me giggling for miles. Second story: my long-lost running partner neighbor (he gave up years ago) used to do 3 miles with me just about every morning. He isn't exactly (how should I put this?) in great shape, so "running" isn't quite the right term. But since the boy had the worst diet in history and a bunch of other bad habits, he puked on just about every run. And I don't mean a little bit, either. I think I lost five pounds just because he ruined my appetite every morning. Well, the guy is (or was) a major pothead. Smoked like a fiend. Which, along with a diet consisting mainly of red meat and alcohol, tends to mess with your insides. So on one particular early Tennessee morning, we're running up a hill and (now how to put this politely?) .... well, he managed to simultaneously puke his guts out and crap his pants. It was classic. I think I cracked a rib trying not to laugh. Just say no to drugs, kids. This is what happens.

Well, you warned us! Wink

How hilarious! Do people just "go" wherever during races? The longest I ran was a 10 miler and I don't remember anyone going right out in the open. Of course, this is the same person who started walking north right past a huge line of yellow buses. That would be a fear of mine, though...getting into a longer race and then having to go! What a pain that would be!! Too bad about your neighbor! You really had to love the guy to continue running with him like that. Were you the one who dragged him out the door, or was he self motivated?

Quote from JakeKnight on 1/22/2007 at 9:55 AM:

Getting up quickly before the swarm of nervous finish line helpers could do anything, I told them "No, no, I'm good. Really, no, I'm good. I planned that" and some other babbling. I did manage to scrape my elbow quite well and after getting my act together, wandered over to the medical tent. When the nurse asked, what happened, I told her "I got hit by a car at mile 13 but still managed to finish." After all, I'd be a fool to ever tell anyone how stupid I was trying to jump after 26.2 Unfortunately, the finish line photo did not capture either the jump or the fall, but I'm sure I provided a good laugh for those who saw it.

Oh my gosh! I'm still laughing!!! Big grin

GreginND

still alive

posted: 1/22/2007 at 5:41 PM

Yeah, people go all over the place. It's pretty easy for us guys. The Disney marathon a couple weeks ago was the first time I saw women squating in the open. That being said, for some reason my bladder becomes super active at the beginning of a race. I swear I had to hit the trees 4 times in the hour before the race stareted (porta potty lines way too long and I leave them for the gals). Then another 3 times during the first 8 miles. After that I didn't have to pee until long after the race ended. When you gotta go you gotta go!

Greg in ND

One day at a time.

mikeymike

posted: 1/22/2007 at 5:54 PM

One of the funniest things that's happened to me is I raced a turkey. A real turkey. I was running one winter morning and there were snowbanks on either side of the road about 2-3 feet high. Well I come around a small bend and there are a bunch of wild turkeys in the road--this is on a pretty busy stretch of suburban road too. Anhow they all sort of scatter--turkeys cand fly when they want to--except this one. He/she starts running away from me. Slowly, at about my pace. So I'm about 6 meters behind this thing and it's running along in the same direction as me. This went on for a few hundred yards. A guy in a passing car thought it was so funny he rolled down his window to laught at me. "What?" I said, "I'm taking my turkey for a run." The turkey eventually turned off into a driveway and let me right on by. He knew he couldn't hold me off much longer.

Runners run

OverAnalyzer

posted: 1/22/2007 at 5:55 PM

I can't even share mine as it is too bad. But it is gastrointestinal as well. Tight lipped

The problems a girl can encounter on a long run miles from a respectable place to go to the loo.....

jlynnbob

You'll ruin your knees!

posted: 1/23/2007 at 12:20 PM
modified: 1/23/2007 at 12:22 PM

"Do people just "go" wherever during races?"... A woman almost peed on my foot waiting just before the start of the NYC marathon in 2002! We were just waiting, and I guess the "urge" hit her hard and down she went...there were lot's of "puddles" at the starting line. Then once we hit the VN Bridge (unfortunately my path led me to the bottom level of the bridge), it looked as if it was "misting", but the skies were clear! Undecided

Tried to stay away from the sides! Blush

Once on a trail 50 mile race, I rounded a bend only to have a full moon "IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TRAIL" about 10 yards in front of me. I turned around and faced the other way until she, um, "finished", pulled up her tights and trotted on. Not sure if she just ignored me or if she didn't know I was there! Thing is, only a step or two to either side of the trail and I would likely not have even noticed, but she was 'a-straddle' the trail! Kindof hard to miss! Shocked

Lynn B

""...the truth that someday, you will go for your last run. But not today—today you got to run." - Matt Crownover (after Western States)

Shieldmaiden1196

posted: 1/23/2007 at 12:32 PM

I guess I can laugh about this now, but I had kind of an attitude about it when it happened. I entered the George Sheehan Classic in Red Bank, NJ because the race organizer I spoke to assured me that walkers participated. At that point I'd done a 180 degree turnaround with my health, and while I hadn't walked five miles many times, I'd handily done three or four and had no doubts about finishing. Still, though, I was by no means a runner so I wanted to be sure that there were other walkers in the run. This is a small but popular race with its usual retinue of elegant Kenyan frontrunners and an impressively swift Master Class. I did notice people sort of eyeballing me at the start but I paid them no mind. The gun goes off and Bruce Springsteen's 'Born to Run' is played over Main Street. And the field disappears. I mean, the entire field just takes off like a herd of gazelles and here I am, a parade of one. What the hell, I figured, I'm still going to do it. At a certain point the field doubled back on me and I got a nice round of encouragement from other runners. It was a hot day. I kept on going. Somewhere around mile 3.75 I realize something is wrong. I'm still in the neighborhood where the course wound, there are little kids playing in the puddles by what I can only guess was a water station. The cops are gone. The sawhorses are gone. Suddenly I realize that no one was really interested in marking the course for little ol' me anymore and I am lost. Lost in the middle of a race. It was like a bad dream. I start to see racers who apparently were finished, walking toward their cars. I ask them and they get me back on track. THe clock is still running when I cross the finish line, at least they hadn't dismantled that yet. The only thing that cheesed me off was that they never counted me as having finished. I don't care that I came in last but darn it, I did finish. They just never bothered to punch it in. Next time I get DNF'd it had better be because I am strapped to a longboard with supplemental oxygen!

va

posted: 1/23/2007 at 12:45 PM

This is crazy talk! How can a woman squat down to pee (or worse) and not mess her shorts? Never mind, I guess I'll have to wait and see. Big grin

This reminds me. Has anybody ever been to China? You do your busniness squattiing down over a hole or channel in the ground. That's an experience I'd like to forget. Hey, what does this have to do with running! Blush

JakeKnight

posted: 1/23/2007 at 12:58 PM

Quote from va on 1/23/2007 at 12:45 PM:

Hey, what does this have to do with running!

You'd be surprised. Smart biological management is critical. Don't laugh. Potty threads serve an important purpose. For example - I now take a roll of toilet paper with me to every single race. People laugh at me, too. But guess who's laughing when we get to the front of the porta-potty lines 20 minutes before the gun goes off?

E-mail: eric.fuller.mail@gmail.com
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What's the (or one of) the funniest things that's happened to you when running/ racing? (Read 1242 times)